Thomas E. Houllahan

October 15, 2018

Thomas E. Houllahan, 85, passed away Monday, October 15, 2018 embraced by the love of his immediate family, wife Bobbi, sons Rob and Michael, daughter Cary Ekelund, granddaughter Kyla , and niece Judy Donahue. Also keeping vigil were son-in-law Dana Ekelund and granddaughter Zoe Ekelund. Tom was born July 23, 1933, the son of John Houllahan and Catherine (Cuningham) Houllahan. A series of terrible family tragedies occurred which resulted in Tom and his three siblings being placed in an orphanage, St. Aloysius Home, Greenville, Rhode Island. As a nine-year old boy Tom sat in the chapel asking God, "Why am I here?" He found some answers in a room full of books, woods for making forts, ponds to skate on. After years of orphanage and foster "care," Tom chose to stay in Greenville while his siblings moved to Providence to live with his older sister. He had friends; a bicycle paper route, played sports, and was sent by the town to La Salle High School. Working factory jobs year- round, Tom worked his way through Providence College earning a BA in Letters in 1956. In Korea in 1957 just after the fighting, PFC Tom was impressed by the resilience of a war- torn people and the beauty of Japan. His service stint resulted decades later in tremendous aid this year from the VA. Tom found a job in District 5 of the Providence welfare department. RI sent him to Boston College to get his MSW in clinical social work in 1964. Often hitchhiking his first year, he "misspent" the next living and drinking on Beacon Street, turning in excellent papers, and making friends. During one rowdy party, police arrived with threats to call the BC dean. "Oh fine, he's right over there!" Buoying times for a shy guy who later became union president back in Providence In April 1966 Tom met Bobbi, a set-up maneuvered by her mother and the Morans. He always claimed he, "Listened as Bobbi talked all night". The second time they met months later, he said, "I'm going to marry you." She said, "OK!” Silly girl: a romantic evening for two the first year of marriage, Tom arrived late to candle stubs and cold pigeon. And this established the priorities they would live by for the next fifty-plus years doing what one could to make better the lives of others in need. Tom and Bobbi shared over five decades of love, laughter, sadness, anger, joy. Supportive of each other's passions and endeavors, they also shared unforgettable trips, opera, Brown orchestra, dancing after his two beers, three job losses each, and, finally, 2018 Red Sox. Tom never totally acquiesced to the "sticks and leaves" approach to nutrition foisted on him by a concerned spouse. Tom had unconditional love for and pride in his family; he felt blessed and grateful to be a father and to have a real family after his years of deprivation. Tom’s pride in his children and grandchildren was palpable; it shone from him like a beacon. He delighted in them, in each of their unique, individual talents and their remarkable strength to be themselves. A legacy of hardship from years of orphanage, fostering, loneliness miraculously gave Tom the resilience to become the compassionate person that he was, a stubborn Irishman, fighter for justice with an innate sense of ethics, loyalty, forbearance, and kindness: for Washington Oaks adjudicated youth; ACI inmates, training school to Maximum; hemophiliacs with HIV AIDS in the early 80's; Fall River elderly; kidney transplant patients; MSW clinical practice clients; and, retuning full circle to Olneyville counseling disabled children at CITE school; and of course, his family and friends. Retiring in 2001 from the kidney transplant unit RI Hospital his supervisor said, "Tom truly treats his clients and pretty nearly everyone else with the utmost respect...an excellent psychotherapist who helps his clients find their own lost motivation and strength...who pitches in when the system is letting them down...stepping up to the plate when there's too many cases. Tom was considered a "fall risk" with over 40 falls the past several years; he never wanted to give up. Learning to fall and several concussions from a lifetime of hockey may also have contributed to Parkinson's. At St. Aloysius Home, he hid his found skates and never stopped skating. With the Warwick Warriors, Tom made the first (only?) international goal in Montreal. At 60, he joined the Rhodie Oldies and, until 2011, served as treasurer for coffers never full enough to embezzle., He never stopped asking docs if he could skate again. For the past seven months Tom endeared himself to the staff of Linn Health Care Center (LHCC) who cared for him with gentle compassion. Tom often consulted pro bono with LHCC social worker Richalie Cotter, sharing his extensive clinical social work experience as well as developing a program for fellow dementia patients... a beautiful honoring of his life's work. From Bobbi They were together in silence like an old married couple wary of life, beyond the pitfalls of passion, beyond the brutal mockery of hope and the phantoms of disillusion: beyond love. For they had lived together long enough to know that love was always love, anytime and anyplace, but it was more solid the closer it came to death. Love in the Time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez Missing Tom always will be wife, Roberta (Lobbin) Houllahan, sons Rob Houllahan, Michael Houllahan; daughter and son-in-law Cary and Dana Ekelund; granddaughters Kyla Houllahan and Zoe Ekelund. Also, sister Jean (Houllahan) Marino of Cape May Courthouse NJ and her family: Harry T. Hobbs, Patricia A. Fein, Guy T. Hobbs, Gay M. McGarrigle, Frank G. Marino, Jr. Also, the family of pre-deceased sister Helen (Cunningham) Murphy: Judy (Murphy) Donahue and Karen (Murphy) Spooner. Also, the family of pre-deceased brother John Houllahan: Sherry Houllahan, John Houllahan, Brenda Houllahan, Thomas Houllahan. Also, the family of pre-deceased brother James Houllahan: James Houllahan, Joseph Houllahan, John Houllahan ...and his last dog, the beloved, beleaguered beagle, Lucy. A dear friend Mirian from Salasaca wrote, "Tom went back to Mother Earth - Pachamama- the Creator will receive him." A Celebration of Life will be held for Tom on Saturday November 3, 2018 Park Place Congregational Church 71 Park Place, Pawtucket RI 10 AM: Family Reception for family and friends 11 AM: Service A reception will be held immediately after the service. Tom would want you to wear joyful colors. Memorial donations in Tom's honor may be made to the American Parkinson Disease Association RI Chapter or Linn Health Care Center. Directions: From North Rte 95 South, take Exit 27 Go right off the ramp to Park Place. Church is down the street on left. From South Rte 95 North, take Exit 27 Downtown/Pawtucket Take Pine St and Main St to Park Place Church Parking: Municipal parking lot behind the church.